you’re a grand ole’ flag
amelia’s version in italics
you’re a grand old flag
you’re a high flying flag
and forever in peace may you wave (way)
you’re the emblem of
the land i love
the home of the free (freedom) and the brave
ev’ry heart beats (beeps) true
‘neath (for) the red, white and blue
da da da da da -she can’t remember the rest of the words. or, she’s frustrated with us for trying to explain to her that hearts beat, cars beep. too cute!
lines
orville has been known to make lines with his toys. and, well, anything else that he can put in a line.
you might remember this line from the beach back in june.
then there’s this one from father’s day lunch at pizza hut.
i know we have taken many more photos of his lines, but i can’t seem to find them right now. should have tagged them with ‘line’ when we downloaded them into iphoto, but i didn’t know then that they’d be as important to me as they are now.
when i picked orville up from school yesterday, his teacher told me he made an apple.
me-great! i’ll look at it when we get home.
teacher-no, no, i want you to look at it now. you have to tell me if this is how he is at home, if this is how he does things.
me-(with a huge smile on my face) oh my goodness! yes, this is him! he makes lines with everything!
can you believe it?!?! crazy!
then he made this hat at church last night. no lines anywhere in sight!
preschool starts again
and this time my baby started with it. yes, orville went to school today. he cried, and thankfully, i did not. the boys are both at the same school, but in different classes. wilbur and i dropped orville off first. he asked if wilbur would be staying with him and i reminded him, because we’ve been talking about it a ton, that wilbur would go to his own class. he just fell apart and said, “i going to be all alone.” how does a three and a half year old know how to communicate that?? anyway, i took wilbur to his class and after a minute or so, he politely told me it was time for me to go. what a happy/sad moment-when they don’t ‘need’ you anymore. on my way out of the building, i couldn’t hear orville crying anymore. all is well. here’s some pics from our big day!
an ache
wilbur-do babies have teeth?
me-no. they start with no teeth and then God makes their teeth grow as they grow bigger.
wilbur-how do they eat if they don’t have teeth?
me-well, the food gets mashed up for them. like, if you take a banana and smoosh it all up, a baby could eat that.
wilbur-but a baby can’t mash a banana.
me-no, their mom and dad can do that for them.
wilbur-did you do that for me when i was a baby?
me-(aching-inside my heart) no. i didn’t have you when you were a baby.
wilbur-well, where was i?
me-you were at mommy _______’s house.
wilbur-how did she know how to feed me?
me-someone told her.
wilbur-did she feed amelia that way too?
me-yes.
oh, the incredible ache of not knowing them then. the incredible ache of not holding them, feeding them, meeting those such basic human needs. the incredible ache of having to say, “no, it wasn’t me. i wasn’t there.” the incredible ache of the void that leaves for them. the void they don’t understand yet, but someday will. i know my children came to me at just the right time. i don’t question that at all. i know i wasn’t supposed to know them when they were born, before they had teeth, when they needed to eat mashed up bananas.
but, i really wish i did.
and it’s an ache that my heart will hold. likely for always.
Filed under adoption, children, family, parenting | Comments (3)yearbook yourself
okay, so this is hysterical. in a perfect world, i’d have time to make yearbook photos of all of my friends and family. but, i have a husband and three kids to take care of so…you’ll have to do it for yourselves. i did want to share a few of my favorites of josh and i though. after viewing, head to www.yearbookyourself.com and have a blast.
me in 1968-this is my favorite one.
me in 1976-the year i was born.
me in 1992
josh in 1974-yikes!
josh in 1976-kinda cute actually.
josh in 1996 -i think there really is a picture of him with hair like this.
be careful, this site is addicting. don’t say i didn’t warn you.
have fun!
Filed under for fun | Comments (2)stirrings
God is always working on/in my heart. lately it’s felt stronger than usual. God is leading me into some new things. new opportunities to share Him and the work He’s done and continues to do in my life. i want my life to be about Him.
our worship leader, drew, has written this amazing song, proclaim, right out of the psalms. i can’t get it out of my head.
“my soul declares Your righteousnes
my mouth will speak Your truth.
my hands and feet, will show Your grace
and my life will proclaim You”
i wish you could hear it. i wish you could be there when we sing it at church. the joy that is in drew when he is leading us in worship is contagious. and i want to be like that too. i want my soul to declare His righteousness, my mouth to speak His truth, my hands and feet to show His grace, and my life to proclaim Him.
He is so amazing.
tonight was our adoption group, woven together, at church. we had a speaker, mike, from the waiting child fund. i first heard mike sometime last year, at a local ministers breakfast on adoption. i was blown away by his passion for helping waiting children, and the way he was going about doing that. i just knew i needed to have him come to our group to share his story with us. after tonight, hearing the story again, and seeing his passion again, i am reminded of what i think God might be doing with me. my story doesn’t begin and end with the adoption of my three children. i believe that somewhere along this road, there are more children for me to reach out to. i don’t know if that’s in my home or out of my home, but i know God brought mike along to remind me of the work He is doing and that i need to be a part.
He is so amazing.
and of course sara does that too, reminds me. she has a song, i saw what i saw, that was written about a trip she took to rwanda. please, watch the video here. in may i was at a concert of hers and when she talked about this song, i thought, that’s me.
“i saw what i saw and i can’t forget it
i heard what i heard and i can’t go back
i know what i know and i can’t deny it.”
i have been in the homes of abused and neglected children. waiting children. i have heard their stories, seen their pain. i know about the system and how it works and why it exists. God has shown me these things for a reason. i can’t turn a blind eye and walk away.
He is so amazing.
on my way home tonight, i turned on watermark. hidden in You was playing.
“i will call upon You Lord
for You are worthy to be praised
and You alone are deserving of my life
so this is who i am
a lover of a man who was scorned for sinners
and You, You won the war over me
so my worship will be a life that is hidden in You
Your life is setting me free
so my worship will be a life that is hidden in You
i will call upon You Lord
for You are worthy of my praise
and You alone are the center of my life
so this is who i am
offered to the man who was broken for me”
this is who i am. i am in love with a Man who was scorned for sinners and who was broken for me. and i don’t want to close myself to the stirrings He creates in my life. i want to hide myself in Him so i can be free to do what He is calling me to do.
He is so amazing.
i want my life to proclaim Him.
Filed under adoption, children, Jesus, music | Comment (1)